Ylvis – “Norges Herligste” Art Ranger (Eng. subs)


We are meeting a guy who calls himself “Art Ranger”. Art Ranger… He’s real name is Ingar Åsen, and he’s an artist who makes lots of pictures and stuff like that. He has one mission in life; he won’t pay taxes. He also lives inside a russian war wagon here in Fredrikstad. Nice. We didn’t mean to burst in during the middle of dinner. You wouldn’t dare to taste it. Are we talking Art Ranger? ART RANGER So this is your place. Yes.
It looks nice here though. Yes, it’s the old camp. It’s about to be moved real soon.
Art Ranger has lived in these trailers for most of his life. Oh, really? This is for you.
You didn’t have to… We didn’t mean to make a fuss. You’re an artist? Art Ranger has sold art for both the Royal family and the Olympic Games in Lillehammer. Yes.
Do you work here? I work in Fredrikstad. It’s not easy to figure out how much money he makes, but some of his works are sold for hundreds of thousands NOK. There are those who think he makes a about 3 million NOK a year. I work in California and Fredrikstad, but I’m born to create, that’s my thing, but I also I fight a lot to pay zero taxes. That’s the thing about you.
Is that legal? No. These sausages are good. Do you have a bank account? Yes, I have.
What bank? A British bank, it’s for under the table money, money that goes through like… You know what a Panama account is? It’s like you get money through a hidden system. Or else you can’t do it. So you can’t just take one million to America without them noticing. Do you do that often? If you have it on an account it’s at least hidden.
Where does your million come from? I’m not…
It’s black art, art sold to investors. I get 10% of that. 10 %, is that 10% of your art?
Yes. If I sell my art to them, I get a certain amount of money. That is unbelievable.
I get one million under the table and they get 10 million. You heard it right. 90% to the “investors” and 10% to Art Ranger himself. Is it okay if I have my cigarette right beside the… I’m so used to explosions. How far have you driven in this one? I’ve been to Oslo 4 times. Okay. It takes a lot of gas.
Yes. A whole lot of gas. This plastic cup…
I bet that’s hard on you. I’ll tell you, but fast… Cigarette.
Gas. It may explode.
You ready? Yes. Ow! Well, that went… Did you get that? This is part of it. Every time we start the cars, there will be flames. Did you stop it? I don’t know, the flames were kind of a hint. When you drive these things, that’s how it is. There’s nothing unnatural about that. Video from NRK
September 1998:
Art Ranger demonstrates outside the government building. The doors are welded shut to prevent the police from getting him out. In the back of the truck, these turkeys are hanging. Hagen, Bondevik, Jagland.
He claims to have had intercourse with them post mortem. What were those turkeys all about when you were in Oslo? Those were industrial turkeys. Big ones. But what did you do? 39 kg. Those have big holes in them. I thought “Oh my god, is this possible?” Did you get turned on? I got turned on yes, my own turkey went nuts. So you just named them after politicians and then you f*cked them? The turkeys symbolised dead politicians that were hanged, right? The police wondered what was dripping from the turkeys, while I sat in the arrest and laughed. But during the act itself, you were the only one…
… With the turkeys? Yes, it was me and them. Since I will die, I would like to see that again, but from a different perspective. It is beautiful to me, at least. You need to pee? No. You don’t? I just do it behind there. There’s a water bottle. That is pee. Yes, that is pee. It’s kind of dark in the bottom? No, it’s just the color of the bottle. Some pee, just drink it. Yeah, that’s… It doesn’t smell, the fans pull the smell out.
Good thing you have fans. Is this where you live? I would have been worse if I took a shit in the corner. But you don’t do that? Look. So you live here. How often do you change the sheets? Weird, there is no one here.
Yes. But how often do you change the sheets? I’ve never done it.
Never? No, those are tablecloths I just threw on there. The problem is to be simple, for instance this stuff you can just throw out. Is this an omelette? Yes, that was an omelette with sausages I think? But did you say you didn’t like girls? No, it’s no big deal. I’ve been with many but… I should have had a big one with claws and big… A lot of hair on her back and claws, and teeth like an ape. I would like that. To take care of my stuff at home. We had two wild boars that we got in Råde, right outside Rygge. You had two wild boars? Yeah, they were girls. They were nice. You won’t believe it but one of them we had in the trunk and the other one my friend had on his seats. That was hell, 90 kg sitting in the back seat. It was like a Rottweiler. We smelled all over afterwards, we had to dump the car. It smelled of shit everywhere. Art Ranger has lived in this wagon for the last 8 years. What is that symbol on your forehead? That’s a Maori thing from earlier. It’s from a death ritual I had with a shaman I have this idea that I don’t want to be in this body, that I want to die. So I meet this guy, strangely enough, who knew about Fredrikstad. He took me to a room, we were there for 5 days and I wanted as much pain as possible. The body can’t cope with that, so the soul would leave the body. Art Ranger had a shaman inflict extreme pain on him to “raise is awareness”. At least you feel like you are alive. I won’t do that again. I looked like an alien in my face, people told me. But you’re glad you did it?
Yes, I saw something I needed to see. It’s good with everything that’s done. Yes. Nice. Thank you so much. Thank you, see you.
Good bye. Subtitles by the Amara.org community

35 Comments

Add a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *